Is it appropriate to bring a child to a business meeting?

Rofucious raised the following questions: "...if I consider something a business meeting, I would not bring my 2-year old toddler to the event. On the other hand, if most parents on the board consider this an informal get-together to simultaneously take care of some business at hand for the preschool, it wouldn't be totally out of context to bring one's child. But then again, if EVERYONE brought their child to the meeting, don't you think there would be quite a bit of distractions and it would take longer to finish the meeting?"



In the past, before I had children, I was critical of colleagues who brought their toddlers to business meeting. Aya Matsuda was the first TESOLer who brought her toddler to committee meetings. Her husband, Paul, was the first man to bring their daughter to TESOL Quarterly editorial meetings. Now, Kana is 5 years old and she attends meetings (of course we are talking about selected meetings).



When I first heard of Kana attending a TQ meeting, I was highly critical: "How could anyone do that? That is so unprofessional." But with time I came to the understanding that in this society, we separate our "private" life from our "professional" life so much that end up by becoming lesser professionals. After all, our personal lives, especially in our field, enhance our professional lives. I am not saying that everyone should bring their children to meetings. What I AM saying is that sometimes there are people whose ONLY way of contributing to an association (or a board in this case) is by bringing a child.

At the same time, bring the child to a meeting give the child an excellent picture of who his or her parent is outside the "mommy" sphere. I think this gives a child an opportunity to see what mommy does outside the "mommy" circle. This is important for me.

Selfish? It could be. But unfortunately the changes I have experienced have not been positive. In the past, I would have brought Hannah to one meeting so that she could see what her mami did. I was PRIVILEGED! And, more importantly, I thought: You know, if you are not priviledged, then it's your problem. Now, I agree with Hillary Clinton: It takes a village to bring up a children. And many of us are NOT privileged. So what should we do? Not contribute?

I have chosen to do the following. Choose activities that : 1. allow me to work from home (like the Eskey award in CATESOL or the TQ Editorial board), 2. allow me to bring my daughter to the meeting (e.g., the Hebrew classes that I wanted to take-the students and the teacher said Bring Hannah, why would that be a problem?), or 3. work to change the system (organize a session in TESOL looking at Rocifuis point--the division between the private and public spheres OR lobby to have TESOL offer child services at the conference--which they will do!).

I want to thank Rofucious for bringing up the question that people who disagree with me will raise! Cheers, Kuki